"A baby is the source of all our troubles? Is it enchanted? Are you both sorcerers?" King Frederick the Fifteenth, from Isasnora Snores
Last week I promised to interview King Frederick the Fifteenth if he gave me permission to speak with King Golith. My time machine traveled back this week where I met King Frederick the Fifteenth in his royal chambers. A large fire roared in the hearth, and there were no odd odors coming from his person (unlike King Golith in the dungeon).
The only problems we had during the interview were the constant interruptions from his son, Prince Hubert. If you had read Isasnora Snores, you would have met the love-sick prince. If you haven't yet read the book, suffice it to say that Prince Hubert is like that pesky gnat flying in your face.
After kissing the king's royal ring, he asked me to call him King Fred instead of King Frederick the Fifteenth, which is a mouthful. In this interview I took the liberty of referring him as King Fred. I also inserted the "overheard" comments.
Thank you for reading. If you have any questions for future interviews, send me an email at firstname.lastname@example.org.
Me: A lot of people in this year of 2020 have expressed anger that you had exiled Isasnora when she was just a newly born infant. How could you have done such a terrible thing?
King Fred: Excuse me, I’m being summoned.
Overheard: “No, Hubert, she’s not interviewing you, she’s interviewing me. No, you can’t say, 'Hi.'"
King Fred: Where were we?
Me: I had asked why you exiled the infant Isasnora.
King Fred: Oh, that. Sir Hybroth, a former knight, suggested it.
Me: Aren’t you the king? Don’t you make the final decisions?
King Fred: I don’t want to be a control freak. Excuse me.
Overheard: “No, Hubert. The last time we played Hide N’ Seek, you locked me up in the dungeons.”
King Fred: Do you have another question? I’m very busy.
Me: Why did your ancestors build a glass kingdom?
King Fred: Why does anyone do anything? I don’t know. Glass is sure pretty, though, except when a girl snores so loudly, it shatters! Maybe that’s why we exiled her.
King Fred scratched his head and adjusted his crown.
Me: You eventually let her family back into the kingdom. How come?
King Fred: Well, they still live outside the castle walls in a manor, so we’re pretty safe from Isasnora. Excuse me, again.
Overheard: “Hubert! I am busy with this strange lady from some country called the U.S.A. She is wearing very odd clothing as well. No, you can’t meet her. I can ask if she’ll interview you.”
King Fred: Sorry for the interruptions. My son, Prince Hubert, is very excitable. He was wondering if you would interview him.
Me: Not today, but I hope to talk with him at a later time.
Me: How do you feel about Isasnora saving your kingdom from King Golith?
King Fred: Oh, is that how she’s spinning it? We’re very capable here in the Kingdom Calelind. My knights were able to capture the evil king and his henchmen.
Me: After Isasnora did her stuff.
King Fred: Well, whatever. If she needs to feel like a celebrity, fine.
Overheard: “Daddy, Isasnora is my future bride, how could you speak about her like that?”
King Fred: Excuse me for a moment.
Overheard: “You’re not going to marry a commoner who snores so loudly she puts everyone in danger!”
Foot stomping. “Yes, I will!”
King Fred: Sorry for that, where were we?
Me: There’s talk of another book featuring the Royal Orb of Peace. Could you give us a sneak peak of what happens?
King Fred: People will have to read the book to find out.
Me: Could you show me the Royal Orb of Peace?
King Fred: You’re not planning on stealing it, are you?
Me: No, but I would like to take a photograph.
King Fred: A what? On second thought, the orb is under lock and key. Are we finished?
Me: I had a few more questions, but…
King Fred: Good-bye.