Fame or Acceptance?

We all have a deep psychological need, comparable to the need for food and water or for shelter, that is to be approved by people. This is why fame is so attractive, and it’s what fuels everyone’s desire for fame in the first place. (1)

How much time do you spend on TikTok, Instagram, Twitter, Facebook, Snapchat?

I scrolled through TikTok for about ten minutes and found a lot of people who seemed more interested in being "famous" than putting out funny, interesting, or meaningful stuff.

Yes, I'm old, so maybe I'm clueless. Maybe I don't know what is funny any longer. Maybe I don't know what is in and what is out.

I do know, however, when people look desperate for attention. There was a lot of that going on.

I'm not trying to throw shame out there. I want everyone of you to know you have value.

Instead of doing strange things on social media, however, maybe use it to help others or promote something worthy.

I'm also not shaming social media. Like all things, it's good and bad. I wouldn't be able to reach out to you if I tried writing an article and getting it published. If we're seeking to draw attention to ourselves without any other meaning, however, it feels as if we're trying to find acceptance and love.

Do you feel loved?

Sadly, I'm sure many people have never felt loved. There are lots of reasons we don't feel loved - abusive parents, bullies at school, friends who have abandoned you, and maybe even worse.

We can't really control others around us. We can't make people love us - as hard as we try. Even the people who should love us, like our parents, can't be forced to love us.

Tiny Acts of Love

We can, however, do tiny acts of love - so tiny that maybe they aren't visible to the world. So tiny, they certainly won't get millions of "likes" or viewers on your social media platform.

Pick up that trash!

What are tiny acts of love? Picking up a piece of garbage when you see it. Holding a door open for someone behind you instead of letting the door fly shut. Smiling at the stranger in school. Avoid gossip or talking about someone in a mean way. Listen to others - really listen. Set your phone down to listen. Spend time with your family.

If you're on social media, take time to look at the other posts on social media. Sometimes we're so busy posting our stuff that we forget other people want to be seen and heard. Write down some positive comments.

"I like your dance." "I like your outfit." "Good idea."

Try to refrain from making rude comments. I struggle with that, but it only makes people feel yucky and makes you look bad.

I wish I could tell you that for every act of love you do, it will be returned back to you. Like I mentioned before, these acts often go unnoticed. Worse, sometimes you may even be criticized. Who wants that? Remember, you can't control others but you can control how you respond. Just tell yourself that what you're doing is important and needed, especially when it feels as if the world is full of negativity.

Smile for a While Bundles

Last month I hope you listened to my podcast about Haddie Cantrall and her Smile for a While Bundles.

I wouldn't call that a tiny act of love - it's a HUGE. ACT. OF. LOVE. She has to go through the applications, buy the items, pack them nicely in boxes, and go to the Post Office to mail them. There is much more that she does, but I just wanted you to get a feel of what was involved. Have you ever had to ship Christmas gifts? If not, let me tell you it's a lot of work!

But Haddie doesn't think what she does is a big deal. In fact she feels a little silly doing this. The people who receive the items do not think it's silly. The bundles bring a lot of joy even when the children are too sick to play with the toys.

Seeds of Hope

This month I interviewed Jamie Stilling-Stepp who started Seeds of Hope. That's another person who is spreading lots of love, especially for people with disabilities. To listen to this podcast, click here: Talking to Myself.

After you hear her story, I encourage you to step out and do some act of love and kindness.

Thank you for reading. Please share if you wish.




  1. Yawari, Amir. Why Everyone Wants to be Famous. https://medium.com/illumination/why-everyone-wants-to-be-famous-and-why-its-a-problem-db34d9e0cb11

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