Finding My Birth Father
Author, Rebecca F. Rhea, shares her story of discovery
Rebecca Rhea was raised in what she called a loving home. Both she and her brother were adopted. Their adoptions were not kept secret, and the children were told they were hand selected. She even married and had five of her own children. Life was good.
So why look for her biological parents?
"I waited until my adoptive mother passed," said Rhea. "I wanted to let them (her biological parents) know they made the right choice, that I had a wonderful childhood. The choice they made was perfect for me."
In this month's podcast, Rhea discusses meeting her birth mother for the first time. Click here to listen to her story: https://youtu.be/zHxV2PU2_mY.
Meeting her biological father was different. Her biological mother, Janet, gave Rebecca her father's name but told her not to contact him. "'As a matter of fact, if you contact him, I'll never talk to you again,'" Rebecca remembers Janet saying.
Rebecca wondered what it would have been like had she met her father first, and he said the same thing. It seemed unfair. Despite this, she decided not to contact her father.
She waited with her husband, Danny.
About three years later Danny began searching. Rhea asked what he was doing and reminded him they were going to wait for the right time.
He said it was the right time.
Three names matched his search. He cold called the first man, who hung up on him. The second guy listened and wished him luck but said he was not the right one. The third man said, "'This is a little overwhelming. I got to get back to you.'"
"We both knew it was him," Rhea said.
Some time later a man named King, called and spoke to her husband. He was a retired private detective. He asked, "'Why did you wait until now to try to reach him? What do you want? What does your wife want from him?'"
Danny told the man that his wife just wanted to get to know her biological father, John.
Then King asked, "'How do we even know she's the one?'"
Her birth mother had told them the place where Rebecca was conceived. Danny told King.
King replied, "'Say no more. She's the one.'"
There was a meeting set up. Rebecca was unable to attend because of a funeral. John was nervous because he was married and had never told his wife, Mary, about the baby. John and Mary were never able to have children of their own.
"That was one of my concerns," said Rhea. "I didn't want to just show up and destroy someone's life. We put it on the back burner."
About a year later, they finally met. King brought Rebecca and Danny to John's place and introduced them as friends.
"John looked at me and said, 'You must be Rebecca.'"
Later Mary arrived. John felt a strong need to tell Mary about his child. Rebecca said he didn't need to say anything. He suggested they pray together. They all got into a football huddle. After, John went upstairs. Mary returned and hugged Rebecca. She was welcoming and said, "'You got John's eyes. I'm so excited to meet you.'"
They all ended up going out for dinner and forged a close bond that still exists today.
"It turned out beyond what we imagined. It was incredible," said Rhea.
To learn more about Rebecca's journey please check out her book, Great Is His Faithfulness. Not only does she talk about her adoption and finding her birth parents but she shares other inspirational stories about her life. She hopes her stories will encourage others.
Thank you for reading! I was so excited to meet Rebecca. She kindly agreed to a rather long and intensive interview while trying to get her adoptive father settled into a care facility.
Next month I might have more information on my upcoming novel, Early Summer.
Carol L. Paur